


This Thing Called Love, I Just Can't Handle It

by In_Much_Stress



Series: Just A Random Playlist [40]
Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Anyways, Fluff, M/M, No Beta We Die Like Endermen, SERIOUSLY CHILL TECHNO, Smitten Technoblade, Song: Crazy Little Thing Called Love (Queen), This is for you~!, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, again: read the tags in Tommy's voice, for the lovely person who called me "horrible and trashy" in my last Dreamnoblade One-Shot, no Antis around it seems, oh no wait, screeching our lungs out, you're literally dating the guy holy shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-17
Updated: 2020-10-17
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:55:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,015
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27056032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/In_Much_Stress/pseuds/In_Much_Stress
Summary: It has come to my attention that Technoblade is, in fact, a Ravenclaw, so I wrote this to correct my errors. Dream is now a Hufflepuff, because I'm a Hufflepuff and, therefore, am legally required to write one half of my OTP as such.Anyways. Techno can't stop simping… for his goddamn boyfriend. Someone save their friends, for the love of Merlin.KEEP IN MIND that this was made for us, shippers, and us only and you should not show this to either CC unless given clear and enthusiastic consent. Also, if you're gonna waste your time telling me to stop, I want you to think for a second and go find something to do with your life, because you ain't righteous and you sure ain't protecting anyone, Anti.
Relationships: Clay | Dream/Dave | Technoblade
Series: Just A Random Playlist [40]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1639864
Comments: 34
Kudos: 533





	This Thing Called Love, I Just Can't Handle It

**Author's Note:**

> Crazy Little Thing Called Love by Queen

There is no way Technoblade is failing. This assignment is gonna be honey in the pacifier. He has it in the bag. That old potion lunatic doesn't know what's about to happen.

 _Magic_ is about to happen, quite literally.

Ever heard of a sixth year in Hogwarts inventing his own bone-fixing potion? One that will help mend bones and even grow bones much faster and painless than the disgusting crap they have in this old castle's infirmary? Because that's what is about to happen. The Ravenclaw is about to revolutionize medicine.

“What the Hell is wrong with you, George?!”

The Ravenclaw _was_ about to revolutionize medicine.

Now he's about to revolutionize magic explosives.

In his defense, Dream should not be allowed to laugh nowhere _near_ Techno when he's trying to concentrate. How can he keep his focus on the great goop for bones swirling inside the cauldron when the greatest guy to ever exist is standing _right there,_ laughing his lungs out, hair sticking to all directions and face red?

“And the board resets!”

“Shut up, Wilbur.”

The “board” is a joke between their group of friends and, ironically, started because of Techno and Dream themselves. Dream had shown Techno the "it's been X days since X happened" memes, and soon the entire group was into the joke once the dynamic duo started playfully mentioning it. Now the joke is used to make fun of the couple every time something happens. The pinkett doesn’t doubt the group actually has a board like that.

“Which one? The ‘something exploding because Dream was being cute’ or the ‘Techno almost killing himself because he's whipped’?”

“Yes.”

“Thanks, Phil, I really appreciate you right now.”

Techno huffs, staring at the mess on his table. Cleaning it won’t be as much of a problem as it was the first time he got a potion to explode in his face, since he learned his lesson and prepared for the possibility, but still, just looking at it is enough to tire him out. He’s glad he’s not alone, Wilbur and Philza doing a quick job of cleaning the space while he walks off to clean the results of his pining off of his face.

One would think that after three months of dating, Technoblade, duel expert and one of the best, if not _the_ best, students in Hogwarts, would be able to function when he’s near his boyfriend… But that would be _so wrong._

Techno can’t help it. When he fell for Dream, he fell _hard and fast._ The crush had grown into full blown love rapidly like a fire spreading, and he had no strength to fight off the flames, or willingness. The Ravenclaw _likes_ being in love and he _likes_ being loved back—repeating because he needs to feel that sweet rush of happiness: Technoblade is _loved back_ by _his_ boyfriend. Even if that all consuming love brings him to his knees and makes him nothing but a babbling bumbling baboon, he won’t change how things are for anything.

Though he does wish he didn’t get so easily distracted.

He huffs again as he enters the boy’s bathroom, making a beeline to the sinks. The boy in the mirror gives him a deadpan expression covered in soot, as if telling him to get his shit together and change his ways. Thankfully his hair took no damage, his best feature after the sexy elbows—and, according to Dream, his “ruby eyes”, because his boyfriend is a _simp._

“Techno?”

Talk about the Devil and the tail appears.

“This is your fault.” The Ravenclaw declares, not even sparing the blonde HufflePuff a glance as he does a quick job of washing his face. Through the noise of the running water he can hear the other boy laugh.

“It’s not my fault you’re a simp, Technoblade.”

“Nope, it’s all your fault.” Turning around without bothering to dry his face, Techno glares mockingly at his boyfriend. “Because if you weren’t so great, no simping would be needed. Since you are, not having someone simping for you is a crime.”

“And the reliable A-Student just _has_ to make sure it is being done correctly, doesn’t he?” Dream steps near, a white towel in hands and a teasing smile in his lips.

Without another word, the blond brings the soft fabric of the towel to the pinkett’s skin, gently wiping away the water and whatever dirty had been stubborn enough to stay. One of his hands, a little rough from the parkour and the Quidditch, sweetly caresses one of Techno’s cheeks, and the Ravenclaw can feel his muscles relaxing and his heart speeding up.

Merlin, please, allow them to stay like this for whatever eternity is to come.

“You’re the most handsome guy I’ve ever seen.”

“Simp.”

“Well, _not_ simping for you would be a crime.” Dream almost sing-songs, finishing his drying job with feathery kisses across Techno’s cheeks, only to end with his lips pressed to the pinkett’s in a kiss too sweet for the Ravenclaw to survive.

Obviously, Dream is trying to kill him.

Oh, well, what a way to go.

Techno brings Dream to his chest, arms hugging his boyfriend—has he said that enough yet? If not, then one more time: his _boyfriend—_ close, as close as it’s humanly possible. The HufflePuff comes easily, both hands losing themselves in Techno’s long pink hair, the towel most definitely forgotten on the sink. It is not like their first kiss, but it is better. Addicting. Lovely.

A loud bang on the door of the restroom separates them.

“I swear to Merlin that if I open this door and find you two making out, I’m making another board and hanging it where everyone can see!”

“... It’s been zero days since Wilbur Soot has interrupted us.”

The wheezing laughter of his boyfriend brings a smile to the Ravenclaw’s face even as their friends barge in with loud yells about going back to the Potions classroom and finishing their assignments.

* * *

Art by Me myself because I really wanted to draw it. Please, forgive the badness of it xD

**Author's Note:**

> Check out my [Tumblr](https://thiswriterisaltyasfuck.tumblr.com/)


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